So Childhood is Fun, Right?

Blogs may include sensitive or triggering content. Reader discretion is advised.

When I was a kid, I rolled up the hems of my shorts. My mom said that I had sexy legs, and as far as I could tell it was the only thing that she liked about me.

When I was a kid, I got up in the middle of the night to drink vanilla extract because my sister said that it was my fault for not saying no. 

All the flashbacks the adults had given me left me too scared of her to speak.

When I was a kid, I thought everything was my fault. I was told that I was nothing but a dramatic, copycat attention whore. I didn’t want anybody to feel as bad as I did, so I let my sister take any part of me she wanted. If I was the copycat, it must all belong to her anyway.

When I was a kid, all I wanted was to be able to be honest about who I was and how I felt.

When I was a kid, I saw all the other kids around me and myself self-destructing as we tried to protect our abusers. Because a lot of them were kids too. And we had already had it drilled into us that we were bad.

And when I became an adult, I saw all around me police tape with these words written on it. “If this had really happened to you, you wouldn’t WANT to share it. If this had really happened to you, you would shut the fuck up.”

-“M”

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saoirse.t-e-c
Admin
1 month ago

It wasn’t your fault and there is no police tape here. Speak your truth. We believe you.

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