Healing Ritual for Fusion

[Flusterette]

I used to be a bit into witchy things, but it’s been awhile. So I don’t have anything to actually contribute, though you’ve given me food for thought. And I hope that your fusion is going ok. It’s always weird adjusting.

[Luna]

It is a very odd thing to adjust to. I feel so different, and I have an awareness to things I didn’t used to. I’m just trying to take things one step at a time and be positive. ????

[Flusterette]

I can relate… Sounds like you’re doing what you’ve gotta do.

I’ll try to think on your initial topic question; I used to benefit from being more spiritual & witchy.

I guess… so far, my mind gravitates towards a grounding ritual with sensory aids (incense, dance, meditation music, spending time with crystals/stones or special objects), but I don’t know if that’s helpful for you.

I’m so inconsistent with spirituality, I feel like a bad person to be offering input. And it’s sometimes like I’m a bit of a blank slate in some ways after a fusion, which seems strange to me. My connection to spirituality is ‘there’ one day, ‘gone & forgotten’ the next. I’ll ebb and flow like that; I haven’t been “into”/connected to spirituality for over half a year.

Though, I’ve just started something called “The Inner Bonding Workbook,” and it’s spirituality-friendly, kind of like shadow-work. So maybe I’ll start getting in to things again.

You’re also inspiring and motivating me. So please feel free (if you want) to share your ritual as it develops.

It’s good you’re holding on to ritual and spirituality, especially to help you during this time. It’s something I know would benefit me.

Thanks for your original post. It’s proving to be thought-provoking, and I’m thankful for the opportunity to think on how I could be more holistically and spiritually supporting myself.

[Luna]

You don’t have to feel bad and your suggestions are helpful ???? I especially like the music and dancing idea.

The fusion for me has been kind of like that, but I didn’t even notice it’d happened (or was happening) for a few months. As far as I’m aware, none of us have ever experienced a fusion before so everything is very new, at least for me. Sometimes it feels like I’ll never get used to it. I’m basically having to learn myself almost all over again, and everything’s really confusing for me. The worst part is the memories for me.

Both of us who fused were witches but we focused on different paths. We also each had our own Shadowbooks. I’ve been feeling a motivation to work in Maxi’s (who was one of the parts that fused) and my book, but it still feels a little wrong.

I might see if I can do a tarot spread to get some guidance. We also struggle a lot with sticking to our spiritual practices. It’s really hard to keep to stick to a routine when there are other parts who believe in different things.

[Flusterette]

Tarot sounds like a good idea. Hopefully it offers some guidance.

Hmmm, if Maxi fused, I can understand it feeling a little wrong to use their Shadowbook. But I can also appreciate why it might wind up feeling a bit “so right.” In your own time, you’ll decide what feels right.

It’s okay to feel conflicted, too.

Nothing is straight-up easy with fusions; often things are bitter-sweet, and that’s just the nature of life. I think sometimes that emotions are double-edged swords like that; can’t have the good without the bad, and navigating the grey-zone (and developing skills to make peace with it) is what really feeling is all about. Which sucks sometimes, but that’s the price of the whole package; life isn’t all good all the time, and healing involves making peace with the true natural spectrum of emotional range. At least, that’s been my lesson to learn, after stuffing away emotions for decades.

Sometimes, what feels uncomfortable is what we need to get comfortable with. But obviously: sometimes definitely that is NOT the case at all! lol! That all being said: there’s no sense rushing what doesn’t feel right.

Hopefully some Tarot will help with honing into your intuition.

It’s exactly like having to learn yourself all over again, and that’s difficult for anyone to wrap their head around enough without even having to live through it themselves. Let alone that each time is a little different. And that it’s hard to even come close to comparing between individuals. But: I feel you.

It feels strange to me that it’s hard to learn one’s self; it seems it should be straight-forward to be “of one’s past selves,” but to become a new self is a bit like how a child is of their parents and raised by them –yet a complete different individual. Anything remotely like that going on inside of you is powerful stuff, and all I can say is: it does get easier.

Hang in there. It just takes time.

I’ve found that at first, it’s really discombobulating. But that after enough time and fusions, subsequent fusions are eventually like “a few more drops in the bucket” — it’s a change, but easier to ride out the adjustment. But that’s just speaking for me, and I think I ‘only’ have/had OSDD.

I don’t get too many memories now, but I empathize. I am getting a lot of emotional flashbacks, though. Freaking movies and tv shows bringing me to tears, and trying to healthily accept and manage complex emotions when I want to just stuff them away is proving to be a heck of a learning curve. I had to turn down plans today because of just being too emotionally triggered and volatile.

Be kind to yourself, and don’t be afraid to be protective or have boundaries about being social etc. You may just want/need time to yourself some days. Routines are good, if you can manage them. But honour your needs: you’re going through a big thing.

*Big hug vibes*

[Luna]

Hi, it’s been a while but I thought I might update this thread ????

I finally got around to drafting up a self-love style fusion ritual that I believe will honor our old-selves and welcome our new self. It’s very rough, but I’m planning on refining it and performing our ritual on the 13th which I think is when the new moon is scheduled.

We will take pictures and see if we can post about it when we get closer to the time!