On maybe dying in the next few years…

Blogs may include sensitive or triggering content. Reader discretion is advised.

This week was Bad News week. I’ve been diagnosed with Pulmonary Hypertension, which I’m sure I’ll go into in more detail at a later date. The main thing that has stuck in my head is a statistic that the 5 year survival rate for PH is 60%. By comparison, the 5 year survival rate for stage 3 breast cancer is 70%.

Oh. Fuck.

It didn’t really hit me until this weekend. Now I’ve been re-evaluating my life, my priorities, my “secrets”…. and you know, it’s remarkable on how many things Just Don’t Matter As Much.

The result? This website. I’m coming out in a big way.. Did you know I was a post-op male to female transsexual? I don’t talk about that one much. Or how about the big secret, that I share my body and head with a system of other alter personalities? I never talk about that one… in fact we work EXTREMELY hard to hide that fact. But you know, I’m tired of being ashamed, of being afraid of what people may think. If I only have a few years left, I want to go out with a RAWR, not quietly fade away to nothing.

Saoirse wanted to set up our own WordPress site on our own VM, which would be just lovely for Saoirse and me, but the rest of the crew isn’t that technical. So I’ve decided to carve out a home for us on Wix, where its easy to edit and add to the site. I’m hoping this will encourage participation.

I’ve scared shitless of being “discovered” as having a dissociative disorder, but not nearly as scared as I am of dying, so, come on in. The time for secrets is over. This is our life. Feel free to follow along.

#breathing

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